Sing whilst you shop
by Becs
Summary: Pietro, Mel and Lance go shopping. Well, Pietro and Mel go shopping, Lance carries. I've always thought Pietro was the most fashionable guy in the Brotherhood. Just some rhymin' fun.


Disclaimer: I own nothing. (sigh) I own Mel. I own rhymin's.

"K," Pietro said, rummaging through the numerous bags Lance was loaded with, "I've got some new sunglasses, ripped jeans by Diesel, that top I've been wanting for _ages_, some new sneakers, three New York Nicks hats in three different colours. What else?"

"You mean you don't have enough!?!" Lance groaned, "I'm gonna get back problems from carrying your shopping!"

"Then bring a cart! It's not my problem!"

"It will be if I decide to quit, so you better watch it!"

"Wow," Mel frowned, "I was going to ask you to carry my shopping," at that she held up her own two bags of shopping, "but now I feel kinda bad."

"Come on Bell boy," Pietro snapped his fingers at Lance and offered his arm to Mel, "shall we?"

"I am _not _your Bell boy!" Lance yelled.

"Sorry Lance. I worship the ground you walk on."

"Don't humour me," Lance snapped.

"Course not," Pietro said, "ooh! Calvin Klein! Must buy!"

"Come back you moron!" Lance yelled, "if you buy anything else I'll have the back of a 60 year old!"

"Mr Maximoff!" the store manager cried, rushing forward to greet Pietro as soon as the speedster stepped into the store.

"Antonio!' Pietro smiled, stepping forward to greet the enamoured manager, "it is good to see you again."

"Ah it has been too long," Antonio smiled, "I had thought you had discovered another!"

"Never," Pietro smiled.

"Woah," Lance whispered to Mel, "this is creepy." Mel giggled.

"And who are your friends?" 

"This is Mel, and Lance,' Pietro introduced the two teens.

"The pleasure is mine of course," Antonio bowed over Mel's hand, kissing it.

"Of course," Mel said in a snooty voice, "especially seeing as you have the pleasure of kissing the hand of one of the most prestigious woman in the whole of the U S of A."

"Yes," Lance added, dropping Pietro's bags, "and her brother."

"Ignore them," Pietro said, "they like to take advantage of other's gullibility."

"Ooh Pietro!" Mel cooed, "look at this sweater! It is so you!" She held up a dark grey sweater, well fitted.

"How gorgeous!" Pietro cooed back, "God feel that! It might as well be silk! Lance feel this!"

"You know, you are so much in touch with your feminine side it scares me."

"Aww, don't get grumpy Lance, remember, when the road get's bumpy, don't be a grumpy, put on a happy face and smile smile smile!"

"Shut up."

"Look at this skirt!" Mel enthused, holding up a mini skirt with 'me' written all over it, "I must try this on!"

"Wait for us!" Pietro called as Mel disappeared in the direction of the changing rooms.

"What do you think?" Mel asked, striking a pose.

"Lance, stop gaping and tell the nice lady what you think," Pietro scolded.

"Holy shit!" was all Lance could manage.

"You are one hot mumma sita!" Pietro grinned.

"Now gentlemen, please don't stare," Mel fluttered her lashes, "it's something that I like to wear. I like 'em short, I raise 'em high; something up about mid-thigh."

"I like 'em when you shake your bootie, cause your ass is such a cutie!" Pietro grinned.

"I don't wear ankle, calf or knee, I only wear what's good for me. A show of skin, a flash of flesh, guarantees the boys get fresh! With matching coat and perfect hat, don't hate me just because _your _fat!"

"I like 'em short, I like 'em high, something up about mid-thigh!" Pietro called.

"Your turn Lance!"

"I like 'em short, I like 'em high, something up about mid thigh!"

"Just the lady now!" Pietro whooped.

"I like 'em short, I like 'em high, somewhere up about mid-thigh!" Mel finished.

"Well that was fun," Pietro grinned, "okay, it's my turn now!" He zipped into the changing room and came out wearing a black turtle neck.

"You look like the Cruel Intentions guy!" Mel grinned.

"Mel dear please don't be distressed, this is how I like to dress."

"Oh god not him too," Lance moaned.

"With looks to kill and money to burn, it's obvious just how much I earn. With gorgeous eyes and hair and nose, I'm just too lovely I suppose. Ladies, ladies hold your horses, god I love those sleek, dark Porsches!"

Mel grinned, "yes ladies, ladies hold your horses, god he loves those sleek, dark Porsches!"

"Here's a 50 my good lad, shoo you gruff, un-mannered cad! Silken sheets and cashmere wool, a mansion with a star shaped pool."

"Yes ladies, ladies hold your horses, god he loves those sleek, dark Porsches!"

"Just the fella now!" Pietro cued Lance.

"Yes ladies, ladies hold your horses, cause he sure a hell ain't got no Porsches!"

"Laaaance," Pietro whined, "you ruined my song! I was a having a good time!"

"And I'm not,' Lance objected, "I want to go to a shop with cars!"

"Well you can't!"

"But I want to!"

"Lance he like's the cars at Rick's!" Mel started.

"So he can show off the size of his di- "

"Shut up you!" Lance leapt at Pietro before he could finish.

"No, you shut up!" Pietro yelled, thumping Lance on the back with a fist.

"Fop!" Lance snapped.

"Retard!"

"I'm paying for my skirt now!" Mel called over her shoulder, "catch up later!"

"I am not a fop!"

"Yes you are! Nobody could be more foppish than you!"

"Take it back!"

"No you!"

"Are they all right?" Antonio asked Mel.

"They're having a tiff," Mel smiled, "you know how it is with couples."

"I see," Antonio said nodding, then staring wide-eyed at Mel as he actually processed the info.

"Thank you," Mel smiled, prying her credit card out of his fingers and picking up her skirt, "I'll see you later."

"Uh-huh," Antonio nodded, still staring in shock at Lance and Pietro.


End file.
